{"id":4876,"date":"2026-02-23T02:41:07","date_gmt":"2026-02-23T01:41:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/?p=4876"},"modified":"2026-04-07T12:50:55","modified_gmt":"2026-04-07T11:50:55","slug":"consent","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/2026\/02\/23\/consent\/","title":{"rendered":"Consent"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Many things happen in the dream world, everything imaginable, except one thing: predation. Everything that happens, happens with the consent of the participants. This is not an arbitrary rule of a magical world. This is a logical consequence of freedom. If everyone is free to leave, then all those still present have signed up for what is going on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If everyone were free, totally free, even to the point of disregarding physics, what would that look like? Dreams. The dream world is like an interactive philosophy book. Such questions get answered.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Below are two excerpts from The Wraiths of the Thames<\/em>, which I think do a better job of explaining consent than an essay could. The Amanda presented here is based on a real dream character, although the real Amanda is far<\/em> less chatty. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

From Chapter 2<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

[ … ]<\/p>\n\n\n\n

During the train ride north, we spoke much of her friend, whose ticket I had been given. It seems that she had been so long without sleep, she ended in a sanitarium. Her nightmares were such that she became unwilling to sleep, and had developed an array of neurotic habits to fend it off.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cShe dreams of creatures who try to feed on her life force,\u201d Amanda said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cLike vampires?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cVampires drink blood. These creatures feed on emotional energy. For example, she arrives at a university class only to discover that she has forgotten that an exam is being given that day. Or, she gives a public talk, only to discover that behind the podium, she is nude from the waist down. Perhaps she finds herself in a confessional booth, only to discover that the door is locked and the divider has disappeared. Always, there is some emotional plight, and some character who is excited by it, and perhaps has even engineered it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThese are just dreams. Why is she so upset?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cShe believes her dreams are real, and that they allow her to see what is actually happening to her in a spirit dimension.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow so? The next day, she wakes up and life goes on as if nothing happened.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes, that’s exactly the problem.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201dWhat is the problem?<\/em>\u201d I asked, slightly annoyed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cShe wakes up and life goes on as if nothing happens.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes? So? Yes?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI admire suffragists, you know, getting the vote for women. Organising, writing, speaking, pamphleteering… all that atop of the ordinary requirements of life.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat does that have to do with your friend?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNothing.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSo why are you suddenly talking about suffragettes?!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, she’s just the kind!\u201d Amanda exclaimed with mock consternation. \u201cBut the ordinary requirements of life are all she can manage at the moment. Do you see? What if every human had the wherewithal to change history? You know, not every suffragist is intelligent and talented. Some are simply hard-working and dedicated. What if it were within everyone’s means to simply matter?<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou’re saying most people have emotionally draining dreams? And that being historically irrelevant is some kind of … symptom?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat do you think? Before you form an opinion, let me warn you: hers got her locked up.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, presumably, she is in a place where she can get the care she needs.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh, yes, indeed. Many people presume that.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

In Milton Keynes, the locomotive of our train was exchanged, for technical reasons not announced. We were delayed forty minutes. I wasn’t sure whether we would need to transfer, but I was reluctant to ask something I ought already know. Amanda held both tickets, so it was impossible to figure it out on my own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When we finally reached Birmingham, we ran to the main hall of the train station, where Amanda consulted the master schedule.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh, dash it!\u201d she exclaimed. \u201cWe’ve missed the last train!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNow what?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI don’t know. Say, we could visit your ticket owner!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI’m not sure that is exactly\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cShe’s not in a proper sanitarium, you know. It’s an estate house in Runnymede. Many of the residents are simply boarders.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt’s rather like a hotel. You might like it. As a lieu de d\u00e9tente.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI think I’d rather relax at home.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe female patients rarely see men who are not their doctors. You would be something of a celebrity. What do you think? I might make a little money. You wouldn’t mind, would you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cMoney? For what?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cEntertainment. They are so keen on it. And grateful. You see, their lives are purposefully kept monotonous.\u201d She leaned toward me and in a low voice said, \u201cOf course, if they like you, I would show my appreciation.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I began to suspect that Amanda had interests and connections that were not at all appropriate for a woman of her class, whatever that might be. I had the keenest intuition that it was not in my interest to have any part of it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh, you’ll pout now,\u201d she moaned. \u201cDo not pout, or I shall disappear in an instant. You must be a brave fellow.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cCome.\u201d She took my arm in hers. \u201cI will return you safe and dry to your monotonous little boarding house.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

During the return trip to London, I found it nearly impossible to refrain from asking her about the sanitarium, with the hope of indirectly discovering what she did there during her visits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat is the routine there for your friend?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cShe is awakened at seven each morning \u2014 as if that alone weren’t enough to drive a woman mad! Then calisthenics, followed by breakfast. Then warm water baths; she is melancholic, you see, and must pass several hours per day in warm baths.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt really doesn’t sound so bad. I was rather imagining that the patients were strapped to rotating wheels or something.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes, it is not so bad, physically. But here there is the question of agency. They sedate her each night. Then the dreams continue. When one cannot choose her own experiences, her life belongs to whomever does. I think this is the matter. I would find it maddening \u2014 which I suppose would make me an excellent patient!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cEven if she is made to sleep,\u201d I began, \u201d\u2014 and I honestly do not see the alternative \u2014 who else is responsible for her dreams? The doctors cannot be blamed for that! Perhaps she does choose her dreams, merely perversely.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI think she is a pervert,\u201d Amanda replied, and with such satisfaction and finality, that I found myself unnerved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou don’t find that problematic?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWho among us does not enjoy a good spanking from time to time?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI most certainly do not!\u201d I protested.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cTo be spanked is to be set free. Who does not wish freedom?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI see that I really don’t know what you mean by \u2018freedom’.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhoever spanks you has, or claims to have, authority over the situation that inspired the spanking, no?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI suppose…\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSomething went wrong, and now the authority is issuing a correction, yes?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWith authority comes responsibility, yes?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou sin, but someone else has the responsibility for \u2018correcting\u2019 it. You are spanked, and the matter is closed. As long as a spanking is offered, and as long as it is accepted, you are not responsible.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOf course you are responsible! That is why you are spanked!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWe just agreed that it is the spanker who takes responsibility. Which is it? A carpenter, who sells a broken table, is not spanked. He takes responsibility, and that means, he must fix the table. Where there is a spanker, there is a transfer of responsibility. This seems to me quite obvious. No responsible person spanks himself.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I felt quite flustered. Her argument seemed to be logical, yet simultaneously contrary to all common sense. \u201cHave you<\/em> been spanked?\u201d I asked. \u201cI find myself wondering how many people could consider you a responsible person.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She put her elbow on the window ledge and rested her chin on the back of her hand. Looking up at me, she batted her eyelids. \u201cYou might say, I have been the object of much interest and concern.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

From Chapter 7<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

I found myself standing in front of a three-storey townhouse. Predawn light was just appearing at the far end of a residential street, otherwise devoid of life. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I did not panic. I had the sense that I had done this before, or at some earlier stage of the game, I had chosen to do this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I wondered whether a friend lived at this house, or whether it was a house known to me in my childhood. There seemed no way to know other than knocking.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A woman approached me from my right. She wore a tight-fitting broad shouldered jacket and a long straight black skirt. She had a stylish canted broad-brimmed hat adorned with an ostrich feather. Somehow, I hadn’t noticed her approach before she was an arm’s length away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI knew I’d find you here,\u201d she said with a fatigued tone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat is this place?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe last place you want to be.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThanks…? I think I’m having trouble remembering… How do I know you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI’m your friend, but you find me unlikeable. You’re difficult that way. Actually, in many ways. You know what? \u2018Friend\u2019 is not the right word.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI’m sorry.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI know.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We stood, looking at each other some long seconds. Finally, she asked, \u201cDo you want to come with me?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow do I know I can trust you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She smiled. \u201cIt’s not a problem. You’re very foolish.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cActually, you do seem familiar…\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She took my arm and led me away. \u201cLet’s go this way.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhere are we?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThis is a dream world,\u201d she said. \u201cMaybe the best.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat makes it so good?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cEvery possible abuse and torment is available here, connected by a very good tram system, and at the end of the day, excellent clubs and hotels. There are not many configurations of civilisation that can combine all these things.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAre you one of them? You know, the abusers?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She stopped and turned me to face her. \u201cThere is something you need to know about this place, the most important thing: Everything<\/em> that goes on here is by consent.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cEven the abuse?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cEspecially the abuse. Abusers come here because they have low opinions of themselves and they need to elevate themselves above some one. Victims come here because they have low opinions of themselves and are weary of the responsibility. Most of them are lying to themselves about what they are doing here, but that has nothing to do with their consent.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow do you know they are lying?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAbuse is never justified or necessary. It is a luxury of the wicked. It is the<\/em> luxury of the wicked.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She help up an arm to hail an approaching cab. \u201cWe are free here,\u201d she said to me. \u201cEveryone is free. This is what freedom looks like, that’s all.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There is something you need to know about this place, the most important thing: Everything that goes on here is by consent.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4967,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[108,92],"tags":[31,48,136,58,84],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4876"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4876"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4876\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4968,"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4876\/revisions\/4968"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4967"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4876"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4876"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/tolton\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4876"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}