{"id":498,"date":"2023-10-29T02:10:10","date_gmt":"2023-10-29T02:10:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/victoriana\/?p=498"},"modified":"2023-10-29T02:10:10","modified_gmt":"2023-10-29T02:10:10","slug":"alice-in-wonderland-ch-5","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/earlywithdrawal.net\/victoriana\/index.php\/2023\/10\/29\/alice-in-wonderland-ch-5\/","title":{"rendered":"Alice in Wonderland\u2014Ch. 5"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Advice from a Caterpillar<\/h1>\n\n\n
\n
\"Alice<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

The Caterpillar and Alice looked at each other for some time in silence: at last the Caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth, and addressed her in a languid, sleepy voice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWho are you?<\/em>\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This was not an encouraging opening for a conversation. Alice replied, rather shyly, \u201cI\u2014I hardly know, sir, just at present\u2014at least I know who I was<\/em> when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat do you mean by that?\u201d said the Caterpillar sternly. \u201cExplain yourself!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI can\u2019t explain myself<\/em>, I\u2019m afraid, sir,\u201d said Alice, \u201cbecause I\u2019m not myself, you see.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI don\u2019t see,\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019m afraid I can\u2019t put it more clearly,\u201d Alice replied very politely, \u201cfor I can\u2019t understand it myself to begin with; and being so many different sizes in a day is very confusing.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt isn\u2019t,\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, perhaps you haven\u2019t found it so yet,\u201d said Alice; \u201cbut when you have to turn into a chrysalis\u2014you will some day, you know\u2014and then after that into a butterfly, I should think you\u2019ll feel it a little queer, won\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNot a bit,\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, perhaps your feelings may be different,\u201d said Alice; \u201call I know is, it would feel very queer to me<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou!\u201d said the Caterpillar contemptuously. \u201cWho are you?<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Which brought them back again to the beginning of the conversation. Alice felt a little irritated at the Caterpillar\u2019s making such very<\/em> short remarks, and she drew herself up and said, very gravely, \u201cI think, you ought to tell me who you<\/em> are, first.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhy?\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here was another puzzling question; and as Alice could not think of any good reason, and as the Caterpillar seemed to be in a very<\/em> unpleasant state of mind, she turned away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cCome back!\u201d the Caterpillar called after her. \u201cI\u2019ve something important to say!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This sounded promising, certainly: Alice turned and came back again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cKeep your temper,\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIs that all?\u201d said Alice, swallowing down her anger as well as she could.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNo,\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Alice thought she might as well wait, as she had nothing else to do, and perhaps after all it might tell her something worth hearing. For some minutes it puffed away without speaking, but at last it unfolded its arms, took the hookah out of its mouth again, and said, \u201cSo you think you\u2019re changed, do you?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019m afraid I am, sir,\u201d said Alice; \u201cI can\u2019t remember things as I used\u2014and I don\u2019t keep the same size for ten minutes together!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cCan\u2019t remember what<\/em> things?\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, I\u2019ve tried to say \u201cHow doth the little busy bee,\u201d but it all came different!\u201d Alice replied in a very melancholy voice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cRepeat, \u201cYou are old, Father William<\/em>,\u2019\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n

\n
\"A<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

Alice folded her hands, and began:\u2014<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou are old, Father William,\u201d the young man said,
    \u201cAnd your hair has become very white;
And yet you incessantly stand on your head\u2014
    Do you think, at your age, it is right?\u201d

\u201cIn my youth,\u201d Father William replied to his son,
    \u201cI feared it might injure the brain;
But, now that I\u2019m perfectly sure I have none,
    Why, I do it again and again.\u201d

\u201cYou are old,\u201d said the youth, \u201cas I mentioned before,
    And have grown most uncommonly fat;
Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door\u2014
    Pray, what is the reason of that?\u201d

\u201cIn my youth,\u201d said the sage, as he shook his grey locks,
    \u201cI kept all my limbs very supple
By the use of this ointment\u2014one shilling the box\u2014
    Allow me to sell you a couple?\u201d

\u201cYou are old,\u201d said the youth, \u201cand your jaws are too weak
    For anything tougher than suet;
Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak\u2014
    Pray, how did you manage to do it?\u201d

\u201cIn my youth,\u201d said his father, \u201cI took to the law,
    And argued each case with my wife;
And the muscular strength, which it gave to my jaw,
    Has lasted the rest of my life.\u201d

\u201cYou are old,\u201d said the youth, \u201cone would hardly suppose
    That your eye was as steady as ever;
Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose\u2014
    What made you so awfully clever?\u201d

\u201cI have answered three questions, and that is enough,\u201d
    Said his father; \u201cdon\u2019t give yourself airs!
Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?
    Be off, or I\u2019ll kick you down stairs!\u201d<\/pre>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThat is not said right,\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNot quite<\/em> right, I\u2019m afraid,\u201d said Alice, timidly; \u201csome of the words have got altered.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt is wrong from beginning to end,\u201d said the Caterpillar decidedly, and there was silence for some minutes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Caterpillar was the first to speak.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat size do you want to be?\u201d it asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh, I\u2019m not particular as to size,\u201d Alice hastily replied; \u201conly one doesn\u2019t like changing so often, you know.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI don\u2019t<\/em> know,\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Alice said nothing: she had never been so much contradicted in her life before, and she felt that she was losing her temper.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAre you content now?\u201d said the Caterpillar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWell, I should like to be a little<\/em> larger, sir, if you wouldn\u2019t mind,\u201d said Alice: \u201cthree inches is such a wretched height to be.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt is a very good height indeed!\u201d said the Caterpillar angrily, rearing itself upright as it spoke (it was exactly three inches high).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut I\u2019m not used to it!\u201d pleaded poor Alice in a piteous tone. And she thought of herself, \u201cI wish the creatures wouldn\u2019t be so easily offended!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou\u2019ll get used to it in time,\u201d said the Caterpillar; and it put the hookah into its mouth and began smoking again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This time Alice waited patiently until it chose to speak again. In a minute or two the Caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth and yawned once or twice, and shook itself. Then it got down off the mushroom, and crawled away in the grass, merely remarking as it went, \u201cOne side will make you grow taller, and the other side will make you grow shorter.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOne side of what?<\/em> The other side of what?<\/em>\u201d thought Alice to herself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOf the mushroom,\u201d said the Caterpillar, just as if she had asked it aloud; and in another moment it was out of sight.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Alice remained looking thoughtfully at the mushroom for a minute, trying to make out which were the two sides of it; and as it was perfectly round, she found this a very difficult question. However, at last she stretched her arms round it as far as they would go, and broke off a bit of the edge with each hand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd now which is which?\u201d she said to herself, and nibbled a little of the right-hand bit to try the effect: the next moment she felt a violent blow underneath her chin: it had struck her foot!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
She was a good deal frightened by this very sudden change, but she felt that there was no time to be lost, as she was shrinking rapidly; so she set to work at once to eat some of the other bit. Her chin was pressed so closely against her foot, that there was hardly room to open her mouth; but she did it at last, and managed to swallow a morsel of the lefthand bit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
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*      *      *      *      *      *      *
<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cCome, my head\u2019s free at last!\u201d said Alice in a tone of delight, which changed into alarm in another moment, when she found that her shoulders were nowhere to be found: all she could see, when she looked down, was an immense length of neck, which seemed to rise like a stalk out of a sea of green leaves that lay far below her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat can<\/em> all that green stuff be?\u201d said Alice. \u201cAnd where have<\/em> my shoulders got to? And oh, my poor hands, how is it I can\u2019t see you?\u201d She was moving them about as she spoke, but no result seemed to follow, except a little shaking among the distant green leaves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As there seemed to be no chance of getting her hands up to her head, she tried to get her head down to them, and was delighted to find that her neck would bend about easily in any direction, like a serpent. She had just succeeded in curving it down into a graceful zigzag, and was going to dive in among the leaves, which she found to be nothing but the tops of the trees under which she had been wandering, when a sharp hiss made her draw back in a hurry: a large pigeon had flown into her face, and was beating her violently with its wings.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSerpent!\u201d screamed the Pigeon.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m not<\/em> a serpent!\u201d said Alice indignantly. \u201cLet me alone!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSerpent, I say again!\u201d repeated the Pigeon, but in a more subdued tone, and added with a kind of sob, \u201cI\u2019ve tried every way, and nothing seems to suit them!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI haven\u2019t the least idea what you\u2019re talking about,\u201d said Alice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019ve tried the roots of trees, and I\u2019ve tried banks, and I\u2019ve tried hedges,\u201d the Pigeon went on, without attending to her; \u201cbut those serpents! There\u2019s no pleasing them!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Alice was more and more puzzled, but she thought there was no use in saying anything more till the Pigeon had finished.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAs if it wasn\u2019t trouble enough hatching the eggs,\u201d said the Pigeon; \u201cbut I must be on the look-out for serpents night and day! Why, I haven\u2019t had a wink of sleep these three weeks!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m very sorry you\u2019ve been annoyed,\u201d said Alice, who was beginning to see its meaning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd just as I\u2019d taken the highest tree in the wood,\u201d continued the Pigeon, raising its voice to a shriek, \u201cand just as I was thinking I should be free of them at last, they must needs come wriggling down from the sky! Ugh, Serpent!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut I\u2019m not<\/em> a serpent, I tell you!\u201d said Alice. \u201cI\u2019m a\u2014I\u2019m a\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWell! What<\/em> are you?\u201d said the Pigeon. \u201cI can see you\u2019re trying to invent something!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2014I\u2019m a little girl,\u201d said Alice, rather doubtfully, as she remembered the number of changes she had gone through that day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cA likely story indeed!\u201d said the Pigeon in a tone of the deepest contempt. \u201cI\u2019ve seen a good many little girls in my time, but never one<\/em> with such a neck as that! No, no! You\u2019re a serpent; and there\u2019s no use denying it. I suppose you\u2019ll be telling me next that you never tasted an egg!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI have<\/em> tasted eggs, certainly,\u201d said Alice, who was a very truthful child; \u201cbut little girls eat eggs quite as much as serpents do, you know.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI don\u2019t believe it,\u201d said the Pigeon; \u201cbut if they do, why then they\u2019re a kind of serpent, that\u2019s all I can say.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This was such a new idea to Alice, that she was quite silent for a minute or two, which gave the Pigeon the opportunity of adding, \u201cYou\u2019re looking for eggs, I know that<\/em> well enough; and what does it matter to me whether you\u2019re a little girl or a serpent?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt matters a good deal to me<\/em>,\u201d said Alice hastily; \u201cbut I\u2019m not looking for eggs, as it happens; and if I was, I shouldn\u2019t want yours<\/em>: I don\u2019t like them raw.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWell, be off, then!\u201d said the Pigeon in a sulky tone, as it settled down again into its nest. Alice crouched down among the trees as well as she could, for her neck kept getting entangled among the branches, and every now and then she had to stop and untwist it. After a while she remembered that she still held the pieces of mushroom in her hands, and she set to work very carefully, nibbling first at one and then at the other, and growing sometimes taller and sometimes shorter, until she had succeeded in bringing herself down to her usual height.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It was so long since she had been anything near the right size, that it felt quite strange at first; but she got used to it in a few minutes, and began talking to herself, as usual. \u201cCome, there\u2019s half my plan done now! How puzzling all these changes are! I\u2019m never sure what I\u2019m going to be, from one minute to another! However, I\u2019ve got back to my right size: the next thing is, to get into that beautiful garden\u2014how is<\/em> that to be done, I wonder?\u201d As she said this, she came suddenly upon an open place, with a little house in it about four feet high. \u201cWhoever lives there,\u201d thought Alice, \u201cit\u2019ll never do to come upon them this<\/em> size: why, I should frighten them out of their wits!\u201d So she began nibbling at the righthand bit again, and did not venture to go near the house till she had brought herself down to nine inches high.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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