Management of Similarity Moment

I recently came into a situation in which a collaborator had made herself unreliable, to the extent that she was no collaborator at all. In the aftermath of the most recent disappointment, I got the idea to message her to say that I saw no way of working with her.

Then I had a management of similarity moment.

This person was an ally, albeit an ineffective one. The goal of my message was already achieved, namely, non-collaboration. I had nothing to do or say in order to get the outcome I wanted. I could only get the dark satisfaction of making my disappointment known. On the other hand, by saying nothing, I could leave the door open for some future unreliable, spontaneous contribution. I could maybe get something rather than assuredly nothing.

Management of similarity is hard because it is counter-intuitive. After all, right is right and wrong is wrong. I see, however, over and over again, that ‘right and wrong’ are mental levers to enable us to eschew what we want.

Do billionaires believe in right and wrong? There is no evidence of it.

Are they getting what they want? Yes.

Are they financing media that tells us what is right and wrong? Yes.

Are we getting what we want?

The most secure prison is the one that inmates do not notice.